If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize