My brain says no but my pants say off.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
