He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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