You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Randomize
