How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
