1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
people are starting to question the shark bite story
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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