I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
