She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
