I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
