You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
