it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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