I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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