You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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