did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
