The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
