3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize