I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
