I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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