I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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