your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Watching her eat just hurts me
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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