i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
