if you like me you must not know who I am
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
