Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
we're so committed to being not committed
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
