Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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