Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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