Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
