tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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