Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
