just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
