I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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