is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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