JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
