I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
