I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
