Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Are my feet made of real feet?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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