I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
