Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
