biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Please don't give away my fajitas
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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