Me. At least after what I've been through.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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