The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
