haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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