Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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