Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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