oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
