Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize