Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
