yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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