and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
