We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
