i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I love having hate sex.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
