I think I am morally bankrupt
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
